Tuesday, November 26, 2013

BEA: Blogging Envy Anonymous

Hello fellow bloggers, and welcome to BEA, your four-step program for taking your jealousy toward each other and twisting it into something productive rather than detrimental. With Thanksgiving approaching for us Americans, the book blogging community should be full of gratitude, and there is no better time to detox your mind of bitter feelings. While we will never be able to flush all the envy out of blogging, we can put the competitive sides of our brains to work, and by following this simple process, you can do just that. 
1. Identify the source of your jealousy.
Are you lusting after Blogger A's giant book hauls? Or perhaps it is Blogger B's clever reviewing style that you desire. Whatever it is, figure out exactly what paints your eyes a shiny emerald green. Got it? Okay, now it is time to… 
2. Acknowledge the problem.
You are jealous. That is normal. And as long as you can keep that feeling in check, that is okay. In fact, if you deal with it correctly, it can be great. You should try to improve your blog, and watching other bloggers who excel in a certain area can inspire you to…
3. Use your jealousy as a motivator.
When a person wants something that someone else has, he or she tends to resort to two natural reactions: hating the person who is causing the jealousy and/or hating his or herself. But it does not have to be this way. Instead of viewing other bloggers as competition, turn their successes into your goals and compete with yourself and only yourself. Instead of thinking, My discussion posts are terrible compared to that blogger's, think, She always shares such thoughtful, intelligent opinions. She is a great blogger and can inspire me. When you shift your thoughts from jealous self-insults to kind observations and goals for yourself, you improve your attitude toward both parties and encourage yourself to reach for your ambitions. 
And when all else fails and you cannot crush the little jealous voice nagging in your ear, just remember… 
4. Do not think other bloggers' successes make your site any less special.
There is room for thousands of blogs in the blogosphere. Each one has a different set of readers because each one produces different content, and you will never be able to appeal to everyone. I read other blogs because I like the bloggers' voices and trust their tastes in books, but I cannot say that about every website I visit. Your blog will not be right for everyone, but this community allows you to connect with the people who do love your content. Talk to people who read your blog, and talk to the people whose blogs you read. Soon you will see that no matter how many comments someone else's creative post received, you can still shine in your own blogging style.
How do you overcome your blogging jealousy? Share your tips in the comments.

12 comments:

  1. Great post! I do think if you are envious over another blogger, you should use that to motivate you to improve your own blog. Do what you love and make that your reason for being happy. :)

    -Lauren

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    1. Yes! You basically just summarized my entire post into one concise comment. :)

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  2. This is such a great post, Emily. We're always reminded to not be jealous or to not compare, but let's face it, we do. And THIS shows how to change these natural feelings and make it less likely for it to happen again. Also, great reminders for when you're in the depths of despair and overcome with envy.

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    1. Thanks! I'll always experience blogging envy in some way, and I recently realized that, while I will never eradicate it, I can use it as motivation. My plan has been helping me and hopefully it can help others.

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  3. I don't think I've ever really been envious of another blogger. I think I more admire them and get excited about the day I can reach that level :D

    Ever the optimist haha

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    1. Wow, that's awesome! It sounds like you're already following my tips and don't even need this post. Keep doing what you are doing because we can all learn from you.

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  4. Haha oh yes i have been there. Mostly the blog design. URGH--I have probably changed it a gagillion time my commenters are probably like "Yup, there she goes changing themes again" XD but I get so jealous of some that i have fixed up my blog until I have loved it. <3

    Those steps are absolutely useful! Next time I come across a blog i get jealous at, I will pull out this little handy dandy hand book and know that my blog is just as amazing as everyone else's.

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    1. Design envy is a definite problem as well. I even get jealous of myself because my other blog, Lit Up Review, has a professional design and the designer did a brilliant job.

      Yay! It is, and I'm glad my post will help you remember that!

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  5. Wow, as a new blogger myself I too used to suffer bouts of jealousy after viewing established blogs that gets tons of ARCs, pageviews, comments...
    I totally agree that this can be a good opportunity to improve ourselves and make the most of it.
    Excellent post :)

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    1. I get envious of "established" bloggers as well, especially when it comes to comments. I remember starting out and gazing at The Story Siren in awe. But our blogs are growing! And someday we will (maybe) be just like them. :)

      Thanks!

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  6. This is a fantastic, post! Love, love, love it! I think everyone goes through a time of not being happy with how their blog Is going...but I agree, it makes you want to do better!

    -Sophie:)

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    1. Thanks! It's definitely a natural part of blogging, and I'm amazed at anyone who claims to never be jealous.

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